Writing a new storyline for our lives: 5 ways to make lasting changes

Did you know that 90% of our thoughts are recycled? That means that we are repeating our thoughts over and over all day long every day!  Most of the time we do not consciously get to choose who teaches us certain lessons in life but we can choose how many times we are going to repeat the lesson until finally we see and make a change. Interesting how the story goes on repeat while the lesson is played out in different scenarios.

https://www.pinterest.com/explore/change-quotes/

Are you having thoughts that keep you going in circles about the same issue, it brings you distress and there is never an end or a result that fixes anything. Is this story true? If it is, is going over it again and again helping you recognize new choices? Likely not.

All of these stories and judgements are putting dividers between us and creating the same separation that divides countries, families and isolates people. The media has really taken advantage of using the victim, hero, villain scenario to market products and gain peoples attention of products and services. They do this by creating needs in people, framing issues in such a way that there is the victim, hero, and villain. Imagine what this does to our subconscious, engraving stories, of a helpless victim needing to be saved from the villain.  

You can change your story.

How to make a lasting change:

https://harmonyxxx.wordpress.com/tag/quotes-on-commitment/ 

1)   Become mindful of what you are doing and how you are acting-the watcher of your feelings and thoughts

2)  Try not to judge them as bad or good

3)  Make a list of positive affirmations that you can say to yourself daily or in times of difficulty

4)  Focus on staying calm- sometimes it is a matter of just making it through the next 5 minutes

5) Make a list of activities you can do to distract yourself in times of difficulty

Go easy on yourself, beating yourself up if you do not get it right will do the opposite of making a positive change. This is going to take practice and vigilance. You will need to commit and then recommit, several times a day maybe hundreds. It does get easier, you are changing a pattern that has been a part of your life story for a long time and this can create anxiety. We tend to want to hold onto these old familiar patterns, overtime if we do not follow through we may forget why we were doing this to begin with. That is why it is important to have the affirmations and your goal written down and in a place where you can see it and read it regularly.

Before you know it you will not have to try to distract yourself anymore. This is not about ignoring our feelings, its about not getting stuck in them. We are the only ones who can make these changes for ourselves. We do not need to accept others realities as our own. Cut through all of the stories you tell yourself and what you hear. You will see that others have their own story. So whatever you do make sure your story is one you enjoy reading.

http://inktank.fi/9-john-lennon-quotes-everyone-should-read/

3 ways to work smarter not harder when starting a business

Starting a business can be all consuming, never mind all of the things in our personal lives that we have going on. Some may go from working a job with set hours to working when our clients need us. One of the best pieces of advice I received in the early years of starting as a self employed Realtor, was to never stop prospecting. Even when you have 5 people you are working with, you need to continue doing the things you did when you had no one.

http://www.valiant-design.com/design/cool-backgrounds-for-tumblr-flowers

So horray! Your now self employed, you have some clients on the go and you are continuing to do the things that helped you get the business to begin with, wait, why do you feel guilty all the time?  You know that feeling or thought that is constantly buzzing around you, following you around, saying you should be working, why aren’t you working, what about these clients where will you find your next ones?  It can be utterly chaotic as you know or will soon find out. Here are some tips that I picked up along the way that will help:

1.  Networking- Try joining a networking group, that way you have a set day each week that will kick start your day, and motivate you for the rest of the week. You can associate and mingle with other professionals that can help you grow your business and vice versa. The key to networking is focus on what you can give people not on what they can give you. It’s the law of recipriocity. BNI is a world wide group with 100’s of chapters,
http://www.bnicanada.ca.

galaxybackground.com

2.   Organization is key- Every woman needs a day planner. When I do not get to everything or something comes up I easily switch the task to the next day. Its best to have those ideas in a day planner rather than floating around in your mind repeating itself like a stressful mantra.

3. Scheduling- Set specific days, at least two a week where you strictly work on your business not in your business. These are great days to plan your branding, meet with a website person, take a mortgage broker out for lunch, talk with your accountant about more efficient ways to keep your accounts more organized. Don’t forget that day off, scheduling one day where you do not work is an absolute necessity for everyone’s sanity. What is the point of working as hard as you do if you are not enjoying yourself.  Then there are the days that are strictly working with clients, set those days ahead of time.  These are the days your focused and in the work zone. We are left with a couple of days left for errands and to do lists.

Having set days to work, brings balance and peace of mind that you are doing the things you need to do to continue being a success. Because success is not just about sales and running around unhappy in nice shoes. Although that is a lot of fun too. Believe me your clients will appreciate and notice a more organized and relaxed you, which goes a long way in building trust. Our clients want to know that we can handle the business they give us, and will give you more referrals if you are relaxed enough to take the time to get to know them.    

Good luck!

http://galaxybackground.com/flowers-tumblr-photography-lovely/